Descent into Madness: A Quick Word about Social Media

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I just noticed that I have not written a word since December.  To be honest, it is because I am slipping into a state of madness.  As hard as I try, I am continuing to slide into this state, but the only thing that prevents me from going completely over are my sons.  Honestly, I never knew what it was like to love before them. And now, I doubt how loved anyone before them. But they are young and are from me. As mother, I am the closest thing to a god as they are going to get. This is true of all mothers by the way.

So, this is why it is important to prevent myself from going completely insane.  Sometimes, I even try to avoid other family members when I am on the edge looking down. It's not that I don't love them or want to help but I just can't some days.  It is difficult to make it clear that it is not personal, I am just trying to keep my sanity for myself and my sons (and sometimes my partner, as he faces ground zero every day. Yes, feel free to feel sorry for him, he deserves the compassion).  I love them all. But I just can't do it any more, especially if they are acting insane themselves. My sanity is for me and my sons.

What is NOT helping is Twitter.  I really just try to follow news, well Politics, but I find myself bored at home with only the dog to talk to you.  And it does not help that I have become white noise to my partner of 20 years. Seriously, he falls asleep while I am in mid-sentence.  Yeah, it's funny to many of you, but it kills me inside every time he does it, especially when he is the one that started the conversation on Politics. Well, at least he does not fall asleep when we talk about sex or are having it, so I guess that is a plus.

And talking to friends or family about Politics? Fuck that. Most want to bring it up during family get-togethers, and I am like: really?  Well, what usually ends up happening is that the men yell over me, like they are all fucking Sean Hannity.  NOTE: You don't win the fucking argument because you are FUCKING YELLING. I am mostly talking to my Dad, brothers and brothers-in-law, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!  And when I do get word in, and yes, admittedly most the time I am yelling too or talking loud...I try to be educated by sharing the things I know, or asking them questions because it shuts them up for five seconds.  One time my own father, was like, "I didn't understand any thing you were talking about." But then he switched the subject on me, which is usually the "woman" response in my family. My oldest sister is the master of this. And the only one that uses it successfully on me. Seriously, she is good at this, like some kind of Jedi. She doesn't like me getting worked up.

So, I no longer try to talk about Politics any more at these, even though I am smarter than most of them in this area. Yes, I am talking to the men in my family. (Though I think I will take my oldest sister's sister-in-law to task one day, because I realized not too long ago that she is opposite from me, and she got on my nerves last time.  I am still angry that I should have said something.) But honestly, I don't mind if someone really is interested in discussing something Political and wants to know or to share. I love sharing knowledge, because sometimes I learn something.

But you know what? Fuck it, you all want to yell and cause everyone to be uncomfortable in talking about politics at family/friend functions, well I AM YOUR BITCH, from now on. Bring it! OK, that is not the point of this writing but I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER.  Whoo! (Now look, I am yelling.)

Which by the way, we are having a 20th Anniversary party at my house, so please bring your best shit if you come.  Just a warning, I will be drinking, so it's all on you.

Note to oldest sister: It won't be my fault, they have all been warned. Please use your Jedi-mind trick on them.

But anyway, back to Twitter.

Twitter, like the other social media cesspools, has it's positives (I keep up on politics and share humor with others) and it's negatives (people troll you and are hateful assholes, and you get crazies direct messaging you).  But what can send you into deeper into madness, especially if your sanity is fragile, is Direct Messaging with someone (a stranger) that follows you and you follow them back.  What is really crazy is how often I get hit on by these strangers (mostly men, a few women) and some are demented people.  Now, I am sensitive to demented people because I can be one of them from time to time.  Want proof? You are reading this aren't you?  But some of these people scare the shit out of me, not only because my own safety but theirs. But like I said, I get it, some people are bored or lonely, like me.  For example, a few of the men claimed their wives died, after I tell them that I am married.  So I chat until they are comfortable, and then they ask me to keep them in mind if I have any single friends.  Others ask if they can fly to my city and meet me.  That is some crazy shit right there. Ninety percent of the time they stop following me, which for someone who wants to be Political writer, this is not a good thing. (Actually, not writing in your Political blog in 9 months is not a good thing.)  But I figure if I don't have enough sanity for family/friends, then I do not have time for crazy strangers on Twitter.  Please do not mistake that I do not like helping strangers who need it, because I do, I feel so much better after doing it.  Helping family? Not so much, because they never seem to appreciate it, at least most of mine don't.

Well, I have had few good experiences making friends on Twitter.  Some seem like realistic and somewhat sane people.  So I am grateful for the likes and ReTweets from them. But I think once someone makes it too personal, I am out. No thank you. I keep adding and dropping my last name to the account due to paranoia. Sometimes, I want to delete both accounts. But I use it to promote this blog, and eventually I am going to have to make my Facebook page public if I want this to work out. So I just need to be more careful and firm with the Direct Messaging.

I don't even want to discuss Facebook.  From what I hear, I have some family members posting the most racist and xenophobic shit.  That's what I was fighting when Twitter was suggested to me.  But yet I am the one that needed to leave it. I am not sure why other family members felt that way.  The misinformation on Twitter is crazy, but Facebook seems to bring it to whole other level. I hate misinformation like you would not believe.  What is even worse is the hate on both platforms.  To hate is your right and sickness.  To post it on corporate platforms is not a violation of the First Amendment, it's against user corporate policy.  Plus it's the government that can't tell you to shut up, not society or corporations. (Here, I thought Americans loved their corporations to use and abuse them, but not their government. Sorry, that's an argument used in discussing socialized medicine. I need to write about that soon).

Sorry, I don't know shit about Snapchat, Instagram or any other platforms. But those seem more celebrity oriented.  I hate celebrity most days, except for Chris Hemsworth or Keanu Reeves. I can talk about/look at them all day if I wanted. You all know how many times I have watched Ragnarok? And I have been dreaming about Keanu since 1987. But I don't follow either one of them on anything (as my best friend likes to joke: "stalking is 5 to 10 years." Also, I would never stalk any one, no matter how insane I got.  Wait, there was this one kid in college, but he was just too fucking cute. My apologies to him.  Stalking is not funny). But I hate celebrity for the most part, Twitter and celebrity is why you all elected Donald Trump.  You all are sick.

Please know that I am not giving up Twitter.  I just know because my sanity is so fragile, I really need to limit Twitter.  I really suggest everyone take a minute to limit their social media poison.  I think it is physically and mentally killing us, seriously.  Like T.V., alcohol, pot, food, and sex, moderation is key to social media to prevent it being bad for you, bad for society.  (Nevermind  what I said about the sex part, the more the better.)

If you want you can follow me on Twitter at: @JmeBoo71.  Sometimes I show my madness on there.  But from now on I think I will save it for the blog.

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